Pairing: For the beginning Arashi friendhip, later on: JunBa, Sakumiya, Ohno/??
Rating: up to R
Summary: To grow up in an orphanage can be really depressing. You miss your family, or you wonder about your family. Why are you here? Where is your mother? Your father? Everything starts getting easier when you have friends who are your family - like in Masaki's, Sho's, Kazu's and Satoshi's case. And when a baby arrives in the orphanage, Masaki has big-brother-like feelings from the very first beginning.
Note: The first chapters are Arashi as children. Masaki and Kazu are around 8 years old, Sho is 11, Satoshi 12, and Jun is 6 months old ;)
Masaki sat in Jun’s room next to his small bed. The baby lay there, playing with the toys on the string above him. Masaki had his legs pressed against his chest, his head rested on his knees. He was sad. He didn’t want it to happen that one of them had to leave their group.
“Masaki?” It was Kazu standing at the door. He slipped into the room, sitting next to Masaki.
“That sucks,” Masaki sobbed. He didn’t like this feeling spreading in him. Some days ago they had made their vow to stay together no matter what, and now one of them was about to leave. That was really not fair. “And you know what’s the worst thing about it?”
Kazu shook his head without saying something.
“I hope that he’ll be happy,” Masaki said. He really hoped that this family was the thing Satoshi longed for. But a small part in Masaki also hoped that Satoshi would chose the orphanage and them to stay together.
“How about going to the lake, like we have planned it?” Kazu suggested. He was always there to distract Masaki when he felt blue. It had always been like this, and maybe it would still be same when they’d be adults.
“I am not in the mood to go somewhere.” Masaki looked up when he heard Jun’s babbling changing into a sob.
“See, now you made him cry,” Kazu whined.
“Me?” Masaki pointed at himself. It wasn’t his fault.
“Yes,” Kazu started. “You came here to cry and now Jun is sad, because you are sad.”
Masaki stood up and put his finger into the bed. He could see the small bundle turning till he was able to take Masaki’s finger with his hand. He looked up at Masaki and his whine was gone almost immediately. “You know, Kazu, I think we should go to the lake.”
“Okay.” Kazu nodded. “Why did you change your opinion?”
“We are in an orphanage and children come and go here, right? So it’s just normal that one after the other will leave us one day.” Masaki stood there, looking at Jun in his bed. He was sad and tired, but he had realized that this wouldn’t last forever. One day they had to leave this place to start a life without the others, and some would leave earlier, some later. And Satoshi would have his chance to leave this place now.
Masaki could see a small flicker in Kazu’s eyes. “That sounds so sad. And I don’t want to think about it.”
“Me neither,” Masaki said.
“Come, this way,” Masaki whispered at Nino. He pulled on the wooden fence to get a part of it out, so that they could slip through it.
Kazu was a few steps behind him, checking if no one followed them to the fence. “Okay, let’s go. The coast is clear.”
Masaki nodded and stepped through the fence. There was a big field with some trees a little farer away. Behind some weeping widows was the lake they wanted to go to. They had visited this place various times together and it was something like Kazu’s and Masaki’s place to switch off all the problems they sometimes had.
They ran up to the small path which connected the field with the lake. The trees there lay close to each other, and it took them hours to find a smooth path to go through them. “Sometimes I wonder why this place is so hard to find.” Kazu said.
“I wonder if the nuns want to keep the children away,” Masaki said.
They passed the trees and soon they stood on a small patch of grass. It looked a little bit like a beach, but there was nothing around them except water, flowers and the sun. “I brought my Gameboy along, I think I need to reach the next level in this game.”
Masaki smiled at his friend. He could see that Satoshi’s leave lay heavy on Kazu’s mind, but he didn’t want to go on Masaki’s nerves with his sadness. That had always been Kazu. He acted like he was the cool kid, like nothing could ever disturb him, like he was the Hulk in the orphanage, but Masaki knew it better. When other children had bullied Kazu two years ago, he had never said a word, till the day Masaki had found out. Kazu had been talking in his sleep, and there he had told Masaki what had happened to him and what the other children had said to him. It wasn’t all that bad in the end, but Masaki had always wondered why Kazu had never said a word, till he realized that Kazu wasn’t able to speak about his problems.
“I have this book here. I want to read a bit,” Masaki said. He held up the book he had borrowed from the library. “At least I want to try it, because I am not that good in reading till now,” Masaki added. He was learning to read in school, but he had problems with it, so he tried his best to learn at home.
Masaki opened the book and started with the first lines. He could hear the sound of Kazu’s Gameboy, which stopped after a few minutes. Masaki looked up. “Hey Masaki,” Kazu said, nibbling on his lower lip nervously. “I will miss Satoshi, really.” Masaki could see Kazu’s eyes got filled with tears.
“Not only you.” Masaki and Kazu yelled out when a sudden voice came from the trees. They turned to look at Sho, who stood there, not far away from them.
Sho came closer to them and sat down on the blanket they had brought along. “I am really sorry that I didn’t tell you about it, but I didn’t want to make you sad.”
“Do you think he’ll stay with this family?” Kazu asked.
Sho shook his head. He had his gaze lowered. “I have no idea, but I hope that he’ll be happy, no matter which decision he’ll make.”
“Would you go?” Masaki wanted to know. He had thought about this for several times during the years.
Sho shrugged. “I have no idea.”
“I think I would stay here,” Kazu suddenly said. Masaki looked at him.
“Even if the family offers you the perfect place to stay? And you have the feeling that you would feel good there?” Sho asked.
Kazu shook his head. He was stubborn, he had always been. “I want to stay here.”
Sho wanted to say something, but he seemed to realize that it was senseless. Kazu wouldn’t change his opinion.
It was Monday morning and Masaki and Kazu stepped out of the school. Both didn’t know if they wanted to go home or not. It was the day Satoshi should decide about his future, and they both didn’t want to know how he had decided.
Masaki could see Sho already waving at them from the other side, where the high school was. “Let’s go home, guys.”
“You are in a real good mood, aren’t you nervous about Satoshi?” Masaki asked. “Or do you already know how he had decided?”
Sho shook his head. “No, I don’t know it. But no matter how it’ll end, today we’ll have certainty.”
“So, let’s head home?” Masaki suggested.
They all nodded and started their way back to the orphanage. All of them kept quiet. Masaki could feel his heart beat faster when they approached the orphanage’s entrance.
They opened the door and stepped into the lobby. There stood Satoshi, his bag in his hands. Masaki didn’t know if he had arrived right now, or if Satoshi was already on his way back to the family.
“Satoshi.” Masaki stepped to the other. “Please tell us, do you leave us?”
Satoshi smiled at them. He placed his bag on the floor. Masaki hated him for his calm and sometimes way too slow way of acting. “Tell us already, Satoshi.”
Satoshi tousled through Masaki’s hair. He was still a little bit taller than Masaki, but soon that would change, and Masaki would pay him back the teasing. “Don’t worry, I will stay here.”
“Oh my god, I am so happy about that,” Masaki blurred out. He hugged his friend and started bouncing up and down.
“Please go to your room, we need to talk with Satoshi now,” one of the nuns said. She didn’t sound over all friendly and Masaki hoped that Satoshi wasn’t in trouble.
“Okay,” Masaki said and walked upstairs with the other two.
They slipped through the door to Sho’s room and sat down on Sho’s bed. “What the hell was this?” Kazu asked.
“I have a slight idea,” Sho sighed. He rubbed his face. “Satoshi doesn’t want to leave this place. He wants to stay here, and I fear he’ll do everything to make this come true.”
Masaki stunned. “You mean he ruined the weekend on his own, just because he wants to stay here?”
Sho nodded. “He always says that he is happy with the life he has here, and he doesn’t want something else.”
“But you always told everyone that Satoshi wants a family? You told us that he longs for a family?” Masaki asked.
“Yes, I believed that myself, but right before Satoshi was invited to this family, he told me the truth,” Sho explained.
Kazu and Masaki exchanged a look. Masaki wanted to jump and dance around because of this, but when he looked at Sho, he knew that would have been the wrong decision. Sho’s eyes looked sad. Masaki was sure that he didn’t understand Satoshi’s behaviour.
“Would you help me with Jun later on? Maria-san allowed me to change his diapers for the first time and she allowed me to bath him,” Masaki chirped. He wanted to change the topic to get Sho into a better mood again.
“Sure.” Sho smiled. “Just that I don’t have any idea how to do this on my own.” He scratched his head. At least Sho’s eyes got a little warmer again, and there was a small glance of joy in it.
“Cool, but you have to help too, Kazu,” Masaki giggled. He knew that Kazu would hate him for this.
“Oh great,” Kazu grumbled, rolling his eyes. “Then let’s go to eat before we take care of this bundle of crying.”
A/N: Hello everyone, I am still posting here on LJ, even though some already said they'd leave. I will crosspost this story on AO3 and DW, if you want to follow me there, I'd be happy about it. <3 yukitsubute // Sky_no_yuki (DW - still transferring my things there <3) AO3: yukitsubute
I hope you like the update? So Satoshi isn't leaving them <3 He really wants to stay, but what about Sho? And Jun? And how will Kazu manage it to change diapers of a baby? :D